Monday, 30 May 2011

30 Days to 30: 30 Years Young!

Today I turned 30 in a baby pool on a sidewalk in Prospect Heights, Brooklyn with the sounds of R&B in the air, the smell of BBQ wafting to our noses and the sweltering heat of NYC making a baby pool the coolest place to be, literally. Is it ironic to spend the first day of my 30s in such a childlike state (we even had water guns!)? Maybe, but that tiny body of water turned a day that could have been spent nursing our hangovers from my bday party the night before, into a day of pure unadulterated fun that my friends and I will always remember. 
Mood: Woke up in misery, went to bed in bliss

Progress: Managed to get out of bed and turn what could have been a miserable hot hungover day in NYC into one of the most fun days I have ever had in my life, let alone the best birthday ever. Seriously. 

Mentally: After a night of sheer debauchery I woke up in a spinning state to an already sauna-like NYC. Thoughts of regret filled my aching head. Was this really how I was going to spend my 30th birthday? What is wrong with me? Was all this work just a waste to end with in such an immature way? It was almost like the hangover I pretended I didn't have yesterday had accumulated with the one from last night's party to make the ultimate painful welcome to reality, welcome to my 30s. 

Physically: Luckily I dragged myself out of bed to meet my friends for brunch (don't we look so fresh in that first pic?) where the heat was so intense that all we could talk about was how to find some water to swim or at least sit in. But that is the thing about BK, if you aren't down to share a public pool with hundreds of kids, swimming isn't really an option. So we fixated on buying a baby pool and on our walk home ran into someone with the same idea (for their kids) who pointed us in the direction of where they bought theirs. And voila, the heat was beat and the fun began.  
Emotionally: After the slow start and earlier mental state, today I was completely happy. The party was a success and now I could just revel in my best friends' company and be silly and splash around. True to our form, the day after the party was, as usual, the most fun — when it's down to the original crew and we all have so much material from last night to laugh about. And being in a pool on a sidewalk makes it that much better.

Thoughts About Turning 30: This is not exactly how I thought it would go down but I couldn't have been happier about spending my first day as a 30 year old marinating in a baby pool. It just goes to show you that 30 really is just a number (is 30 the new 5?) and whether I am trying to be a sophisticated adult with a formal steak dinner or acting like a child with a water gun in the blistering sun, all that really matters is that I am happy. And today I was.

Sunday, 29 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 29

Today was my party and it was absolutely perfect. I think the pics speak for themselves, but I will give you a bit of a roundup.
Mood: in the zone, happy, excited

Progress: After yesterday's festivities I didn't exactly wake up with the best head, but that could not play a factor in today's mission: tonight was the big party and I had so much to do. So I woke up at 9, went to Target to buy party necessities, walked to Park Slope to pick up the cake (8 hours left of no sugar!), went to the butcher with Megan and Julia to buy 8 pounds of steak, then to Trader Joe's for the rest of the groceries, then to the city to get my hair and makeup done and then to the party!   

Mentally: On a mission earlier in the day but after it was all done I started to get really excited. I was just happy and overwhelmed at the party. I felt like I didn't get a chance to settle into too many conversations with the people I hadn't seen in so long, but there will be a time for that, tonight I needed to run around and be the bday girl. It is certainly its own mental state.

Physically: No rest for the wicked in the early day and then feeling pretty good after getting all dolled up a la Lizzy at her salon in the city. I will admit I felt hot (yay!), and although it was a bit over the top (from the huge hair, cat eye makeup, bright low cut blue ruffled dress) as Mitchell said, I looked like it was my birthday and I was feeling it. Oh and that moment when the cake hit my lips was pretty blissful. 30 days of no sugar was totally worth it. 

Emotionally: So happy to be surrounded by so much love, good food and finely dressed people - just the way I like. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: If there was any way to turn 30, this was it. 18 people all dressed up for a beautiful and delicious sit down dinner, followed by a rocking dance party. It was literally the best birthday party a 30 year old broad could ask for. Thank you so much to all my friends for making it so amazing!

Saturday, 28 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 28

Mood: excited, happy, free

Progress: Spent the first half of the day writing up my Donna Karan story, not the ideal way to spend a Saturday, but she was worth it and I definitely made up for it later.  

Mentally: After three weekends of having to work, once I finished the DK story, I really felt free. It was a holiday weekend (Memorial Day and of course my birthday)and the weather was perfect, a friend was in town and we had so many places to go. 

Physically: Feeling great, wearing one of my favorite dresses, and still going strong on day 28 of no sugar. That is not to say that I didn't (over) indulge today. We started the afternoon off watching the Champions League finals in Williamsburg at Walter over oysters and Bloody Marys (above), then headed across the street to an outside table at Clem's, then to a backyard BBQ, then to the back of Harefield Road and finally ended the long day into night on the dance floor at Legion

Emotionally: There was a moment during this eventful day when I wished I had a partner to experience it with me, but just a moment. And I made up for that later too.

Thoughts About Turning 30: Is it just me, or do you always go big the night before the night that is supposed to be big? I mean, my bday party is tomorrow, what was I thinking? It was pretty worth it though.

Friday, 27 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 27

Progress: Had the most intense day of work I have had in a very, very long time. Fridays are always really busy at this job, but this one was particularly stressful. It was all worth it though, as I was asked to interview Donna Karan about the humanitarian work she is doing in Haiti. I had the story all written up from an interview with her PR people, but at the last minute she decided to do a phoner with me herself. I had to scramble to get prepared, but in the end I felt really good about it. 

Mentally: I was very nervous before but afterward I felt inspired and, I know this sounds cheesy, but really empowered as a woman. I had no idea that DK was so intelligent, strong and dedicated to changing the world. Our 30 minute talk (she had so much to say) that barely even-touched on fashion really made me feel charged and 


Physically: I had sweaty palms and a red face for the whole two hours I waited for her to call. Yes she called me two hours behind schedule, but I still love her.

Emotionally: It was a really overwhelming day, from the massive amount of work to the nerve-racking interview. I was on such a high after speaking with DK, but when I finished it was 4 on a Friday and I still had so much to do. Finally when I got out of the office I went down into the subway, ran for the train, missed it, and then came the tears. First NYC cry in public since I returned.

Thoughts About Turning 30: It felt like such a good moment in my career today, which makes me feel strong and confident about turning 30, even if I had a bit of a public meltdown.

Photo from here.

Thursday, 26 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 26

Mood: Mellow but a little out of it.

Progress: Worked, bought a book. Been on a reading stump for so long with everything that is going on lately. I just want to read a good novel, and I finally got around to getting my hands on one. I'll let you know how it goes. 

Mentally: I had some time to kill after work before dinner with Megan and Jules, so I wandered to the Strand book store and perused for about an hour letting my hands run through pages, read back covers and immersed myself in a room filled with millions of words. I forgot how good bookstores make me feel. 

Physically: My feet are killing me. The most expensive pair of shoes that I have ever bought kill me feet. Is that irony or just terribly annoying?

Emotionally: Feeling a little needy waiting for a phone call from across the pond.

Thoughts About Turning 30: Thought about life a lot today, but not in the context of turning 30.

Wednesday, 25 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 25

Mood: peaceful

Progress: Worked from home, then met up with Julia for a little more work at the cafe and a trip to Brooklyn Heights to again look for a dresser. Still no luck, but I did luck out with a nice dinner outside and a beautiful evening walk. 

Mentally: Took a much needed work from home day and boy did it do the trick. I have been on the go so much lately, that even though I still worked, being able to do it in my kitchen in my pajamas with the Brooklyn sun streaming down, put me in an ideal mental state.  

Physically: Made myself sick eating way too many cherries. Not eating processed sugar does in no way mean you should be allowed to gorge yourself on natural sugars. Ooops.
Emotionally: Just content. I love those days when you don't leave Brooklyn and everything seems okay. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: None.

Tuesday, 24 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 24

Had a great night out on the town. Pretty much the one I wished I had last night, so it all works out. 

Mood: happy 

Progress: Went out and ended up talking to a book editor about a little idea I have for a children's book and he was into it. Maybe this will be one of my projects that actually takes off. Maybe. 

Mentally: Feeling great, it honestly feels like the first day of summer here in NYC, and nothing puts me in a better mental state than that. We ate outside and walked through the East Village wearing nothing but short sleeves, just the way it is supposed to be. 

Physically: Wearing bright orange lipstick and flirting with bartenders, so I am feeling confident. 

Emotionally: Yet feeling a little bit like an idiot for flirting with the bartenders.

Thoughts About Turning 30: If I have learned anything in my almost 30 years, it is not to flirt with bartenders. Hot dudes behind the bar are never the way to go, never. But sometimes you just can't help it. Am I really doing this at my age? Can't I just flirt with a guy actually on my side of the bar?

Photo from Ffffound

Monday, 23 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 23

Mood: Somewhat relieved. Nervous. Surprised to be a little lonely.

Progress: Finished all the work I needed to do over the weekend and just had a proper day at work with no other responsibilities. 

Mentally: Thought I would feel a little more relieved, but it is actually pretty scary when something you work so hard on, that may in fact decide your future, is finally out of your hands. 

Physically: So tired, but not tired enough to stay home. 

Emotionally: So yes, after finally getting my stuff done all I wanted to do was have a celebratory glass of wine with a friend, but everyone was hanging out with boyfriends, going out on first dates, or having dinner at other friends houses. Definitely made me a little sad after getting the 3rd or 4th "I have plans tonight" text message. I mean, I am finally free, why is everyone else so busy? Thankfully at the last moment Julia decided to meet me for a pre-date glass of wine, then her date was postponed an hour, so we had two. Granted I was sent home alone and a little tipsy as she went to her house to get dolled up, but at least I got to hang out for a bit. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: Lots, planned out the menu and the final guest list with Jules. I can't wait. 

Photo from ThisIsntHappiness

Sunday, 22 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 22

Mood: Focused. 

Progress: Literally wrote all day for both jobs and got everything I needed to get done done.

Mentally: Still going strong, know I need to focus and get said stuff done. 

Physically: My physical state is my mental state.  

Emotionally: My emotional state is my physical state.

Thoughts About Turning 30: None.  

Photo from here.

Random Sunday

ST.-MARIES-DE-LA-MER, France—1976.

Saturday, 21 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 21

Mood: Happy but not so much about how my night ended up last night.

Progress: Tried to look for a dresser, didn't find one. Tried to work on the necessary writing I need to get done this weekend, had a bit of writers block (headache) instead.

Mentally: Got up early and was mentally ready to go, but petered out by midday. So a bit frustrated. 

Physically: Oh you know, still exhausted. When will I sleep? When will I work out? The usual questions. 

Emotionally: A little drained from all the stuff that came up last night and the late night calls I made when I got home. I am turning 30, should not be doing such silly things.

Thoughts About Turning 30: Yesterday my old intern, sorry I mean Loren, was the 26-year-old I hung out with. Today, it was Mary's visiting little sister being the all grown-up-girl who used to be so young making me really feel like an almost 30 year old. 

Friday, 20 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 20

Mood: Friday relief, but onto another weekend of working. 

Progress: Met up with with my old intern, who I have been meaning to see for a long time, at my local watering hole Washington Commons.    

Mentally: Out of it. A few beers, which normally wouldn't have had a terribly bad affect on me, did me in.  

Physically: Oh you know, exhausted. 

Emotionally: So nice catching up with someone I haven't seen in at least two years. But still a little overwhelming having to explain to her everything that went down since the last time we saw each other: going to Berlin, falling in love, moving back, moving to Berlin, breaking up, moving back again, you know the deal.

Thoughts About Turning 30: So yeah, I had drinks with my old intern, but I realize I really have to stop calling her my intern. She hasn't been in a long time, she is my friend and she is 26. When your old intern is 26, you are definitely at least 30, and she should no longer be called your intern!

Thursday, 19 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 19

Mood: happy turned lonely 

Progress: Bought a dress for my party.   

Mentally: Happy to have the night off and out with my friends. 

Physically: See below. 

Emotionally: Had a nice dinner out with Rachael and Megan, but decided not to continue and go out with them after because I have a lot of work to do over the weekend (yes again) and want to be rested. But when I got back to my house I felt really lonely, I guess a part of me is still used to having my man waiting for me at home. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: So yeah, I bought a dress for the 30th birthday party. After trying on about 30 used dresses, I finally found one worthy of the big day. I think no matter how old I get I will always go to Buffalo Exchange and Beacon's Closet before forking out the dough for a new dress. This one I found at Buffalo in the East Village. 

That being said, this dress is nothing like the dresses I usually buy at those places. It is not a 50s or 80s inspired tulle number or a long flowing thing - it is just really tight. Not that I am always hiding my body, I just usually don't feel comfortable with the second skin thing. But I figure the whole point of this is making changes right? I am feeling pretty confident with myself these days and starting to notice a difference from not eating any sugar. But we will see, I just want to feel good on the big day, and with this dress it could seriously go either way. 

Wednesday, 18 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 18

Mood: just fine

Progress: Went to a cafe to do a little work after work (WORK!) then actually went home and went to bed early. This has not happened in a long time.   

Mentally: Pooped.

Physically: Tired and hungry. Had a stare down with the pint of Haagen Dazs ice cream that my roommate left on the counter. 18 days of no sugar and going strong, but God what I wouldn't have given for a bite of that deliciousness.  

Emotionally: In an emotionless daze. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: Not many. 

Tuesday, 17 May 2011

30 Days to 30: Day 17

Mood: relieved, calm 

Progress: Still riding on the progress of yesterday, so I didn't accomplish much today, except for sleeping in late and brainstorming for the edit test for potential job.  

Mentally: Tried to take a mental break. 

Physically: Worn out. I literally thought I was sick this morning I was so tired. I have to learn to not run myself into the ground.  That will probably never happen. 

Emotionally: I went out to dinner by myself to do a little work and eat another salad tonight. Dining alone is always something that stirs up emotion, especially when you are surrounded by couples. Good thing I had the peoples' conversation next to me to keep me occupied. 

Thoughts About Turning 30: I ended up sitting next to four late 20-somethings who all went to college together having a little catch up because one of them was visiting from Los Angeles. Yes, I was seriously eavesdropping. Their conversation was sadly typical, full of sarcasm and self-deprecation. Here's a little sample:  

Boy: "We are all five years out of college, and we all hate our lives."
Girl: "I don't hate my life. I mean I am happy with my job, everything else is pretty shitty, but whatever."

Is this how I was a couple years ago? Kind of, yeah. Is this how I am now? No. See this is what I like about getting older, the more years that pass, the happier I get with myself and my life. That is a nice little realization.